Musings: The Past, And The Present

I was one angry person. Who ever takes so much hatred to shoes anyway? Read on for a fun ride.

Whichever fucker said that the present is a present should be shot in the head. Wonder how he'd take that present!? I claim, from experience, of course, that if I were given a chance, I would prefer to relive the past, than live this present. Not because my life is half fucked right now, not because I regret the decisions I have made in life, but because life was simpler back then. There was just one aspects to everything, okay maybe two. Today, before I make any move, any decision, even to take up an opinion, I have to think of it from my shoes, his shoes, your shoes, and the society's shoes. Worst case, none of them fit.

The thing is, as my best friend thought fit to put up on Facebook, " we get only one chance to be happy - childhood, because then we know too much. we find out that it is not just heaven, earth, hell (strange coming from an atheist, but that's how philosophies go) but many many layers. And within these umpteen manifolds that cocoon our life, lies somewhere the real 'us'. Meaning the one where the shoe fits. Fortunately or unfortunately, we have all lost our recognizing ability, and go through our puny lives trying each one on, one by one by one by.... well you get the point.

Why am I so willing to partake the past for the present? Because they were simpler times, because we were more genuinely happy then, and there were no complications in our lives. In the sense, there are only two, maybe three people in this world who accept and love me for who I am. But when life between us starts getting complicated, difficult, trust me, its not worth it. I'd rather stay in Delhi and be with my best friends rather than study here, and let our friendship be withered by the wisp of time and distance, and of course misunderstandings.

All of us need a shoulder to cry on, and when you don't get the shoulder you want(Yes, some of us are very picky, because things that make us cry are actually very personal) or when you are helpless and can't give your shoulder to one who needs it, It pains like a battering ram in your ass(not an ideal simile, but I'll still use it), except in the heart. So when you read a mail from your friend, telling you how in need of you he or she is, and you, being in your circumstances, can't do nothing, you reach to the point where I am... fuck the present, lets all stay in the past. And for the right reasons. But as usual, I do not know how... so the search for this intriguing puzzle continues... open to help from readers ofcourse!